


Nine Afterlives

by Limesparrow



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Feline Qualities, Incest, Multi, Tentabulges, Vibrators, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-01
Updated: 2015-07-01
Packaged: 2018-04-07 05:11:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4250628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Limesparrow/pseuds/Limesparrow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Leijons are long dead, but they're still phenomenal huntresses that live for shipping. Unfortunately for John and Jade, that means throwing a wrench in any semblance of a normal ectobiological sibling relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nine Afterlives

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RoeOcean](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoeOcean/gifts).



> I hope this has enough substance for you! After I've rested a bit, a little more length might worm its way into this story. I had a lot of fun playing with this prompt and I'm not sure I'm ready to let it go just yet.

One of the things Nepeta loved about Meulin was how much bigger she was. She was so squishy and tall that Nepeta couldn't help but cuddle up to her and smooch her right in that thick-skinned throat.

Meulin giggled, digging her hands into Nepeta's wild hair. "Nepurrtaaa," she purred, nuzzling into her smaller companion. They were just a big tangle of coarse black hair and terrible cat puns, not that either of them were really complaining. Meulin's voice was loud, loud, loud, and that only made Nepeta talk loudly out of excitement. Most of the people in the dream bubbles steered clear of the Leijons when they were together.

"Mewliiiin'," Nepeta meowed back, nipping into the sensitive flesh of Meulin's throat. The elder Leijon hiccuped and gasped and giggled. > signed Nepeta with one hand; though she was purring the words into Meulin's neck, that wasn't ideal for someone who couldn't hear. 

Very seriously, Meulin pushed Nepeta away and held her at arms' length by the shoulders. "We need to talk," she said, and Nepeta would have almost been worried, except that the corners of Meulin's mouth were twitching like she couldn't contain a smile. Her eyes-- blank and white, just like Nepeta's, but still beautiful --crinkled up at the corners. "About the Hunt!"

Oh, the Hunt. Nepeta's lips grew into an excited sharp-toothed grin. "Okay!" The mighty huntress clicked her claws together, and it was almost sinister. "Furst, though, I think there is purrhaps something else we should be doing!"

And Nepeta dived back into Meulin's lap, kneaded and the soft fat of her tummy, and nipped at her collarbone.

While sitting around naked was sort of a common thing for these two, they had sort of specifically removed their clothing for a purpose this time around! Meulin's face grew flushed as Nepeta continued her assault, sucking and licking. Sometimes her teeth just barely broke the skin, but she always soothed it over with a few raspy laps of her tongue.

Meulin was a giggler when it came to this sort of thing; her hands scrabbled at the rocky floor of the cave around them while she chuckled and snickered and moaned. It made Nepeta happy to hear-- everyone else always seemed to be so quiet when it came to this sort of thing. No noises, never. Boring! She bit delicately into Meulin's shoulder and felt the muscles jump, felt Meulin's spine arch. Their chests rubbed together-- Nepeta was flat as they come, but Meulin? Not so much. Her ample bosom flattened and rubbed against Nepeta's lack thereof and- the skin was thinner there, more sensitive, and Nepeta at last felt her bulge curl in its sheathe.

Hands, large enough to engulf Nepeta's little hips, came up to her waist. Meulin laughed breathlessly, even a little shrilly, and nosed her way to Nepeta's face. They kissed, messy, tongues flat against one another so that all the little barbs could catch and then peel apart. It stung a little bit, but in the very best way.

Fangs caught lips and other soft bits, but neither Leijon really minded. They weren't actively trying to hurt one another- quite the opposite, really! Meulin's hands, deft from so many sweeps of signing, crept around and up Nepeta's spine. She stroked there, up and down, just a hint of claw to give it some sparks instead of just the sensation of a good rub. 

Olive green was starting to ooze from between Meulin's legs. It was slippery and adhesive, coating both their legs shortly after it made its appearance. And then, of course, with a little more coaxing from Nepeta's fingers, came Meulin's bulge. It was gorgeous and glistening, genetic fluid oozing from its fine porous skin. Fat quivering spines poked out from Meulin's bulge, ready and willing to be stroked.

"So pawsome," Nepeta mewled, breathing in its fresh sweet scent. Meulin's hands rubbed along Nepeta's thighs, thumbing small circles along their insides. Squirming but trying to stay still, Nepeta held her breath as Meulin's fingers grew closer and closer to her nook. Careful of her claws, Meulin ran her index finger up the green flaps, spreading even more olive mess between then. She rubbed the fingers of her other hand gently along Nepeta's sheathe, and that was that- her bone bulge came free.

It was much smaller than Meulin's, and it had bumps dotted across its surface instead of the spines she might have had if she had grown older. Between these two, size didn't matter a wink. Meulin curled two of her fingers around the bulge and purred loudly as it wrapped around them.

Pulling her younger counterpart closer, Meulin tittered as she felt her bulge twine across Nepeta's stomach. She was so tiny and so hard, so full of muscle that Meulin loved to run her pads across. Nepeta's hips twitched, bucked, and their bulges tangled up together. It was wet and green and perfect, heat shooting up their spines. Nepeta's claws were even sharper than Meulin's, and when they bit into her skin- so much softer than her own, so delicate, so very easy to break -Meulin yowled in surprise. 

Oops. Nepeta withdrew her claws, lapping the blood from them sheepishly. She hadn't meant to get carried away. Sometimes she forgot just how squishy her dancestor was. "Sorry," she mewed, leaning in to lick gingerly at Meulin's shoulders. At the same time, she undulated her hips, a liquid motion that rolled their bulges together just so, spines catching on bumps and then springing free.

Meulin's heavy breathing slipped back into its telltale laughter and Nepeta relaxed some.

Independent, uncontrollable, their bulges writhed against one another, almost knotting together. It was slow and it was burning and the Leijons just stuck tight together, occasionally rocking their hips with the ebb and flow of olive green juices between them. Nepeta buried her head under Meulin's chin, mindful of her horns. The squeaking and squealing working its way out of her throat vibrated its way up through Meulin's jaw-- the elder girl dug her hands into Nepeta's hair and pulled, her laughter escalated to more of a shriek.

Her hips stuttered, picking up a faster pace as she sought that final peak, something more than the slow knotting her bulge had been doing. The tip of her sought Nepeta's nook of its own accord, finding it sopping wet and so hot and so _tight_ that it couldn't help but press in. Nepeta caterwauled, her head jolting, her whole body stiffening. Meulin's bulge was wrapped around her own once over and fucking her, purrfectly flexible in every way. 

Both of them panted, Nepeta working closer and closer, rubbing up against Meulin like they could peel back one anothers' skin and become one if Meulin could only fuck her deeper. Not for the first time, Nepeta wished somewhere in the back of her mind that her bulge was long enough to wiggle its way into Meulin's nook. The thought of that, of them fucking each other all mixed up and wrapped around together, made Nepeta seize up. A wild screech tore from her throat and she only just remembered not to tear at her delicate matesprit's skin before she was cumming, hard, everything white and green and beautiful.

She came to to the sensation of Meulin's bulge crawling its slow burning path up her nook, wiggling, pulling back. It was so good, so so good, and Nepeta always tried to give as much as she got. Even sensitive, even fresh off her orgasm, Nepeta rolled her hips and mewled, squeezing her muscles down around the sensitive bulge and all its spines.

It didn't take much, honestly, because Meulin was just as in the moment as Nepeta, and there was blazing hot genetic material puddling all around her thighs and vice-like tightness around her bulge. Her spines all flared out, making Nepeta gasp, and then Meulin was hitting her climax too. Nepeta watched her with rapt attention, they way her mouth flew open and the delightful achingly familiar point of her fangs. She couldn't help but lick a stripe along Meulin's jaw, just once, loving her intensely in that moment and everything that they were together.

They came down together, breathing heavily; Nepeta nuzzled into Meulin's shoulder and purred.

Time passed and they didn't care. Theoretically, they had all the time in the world and then some, though somewhere Lord English probably proposed otherwise. The bubble shifted around them, somewhere warm with beams of moonlight glancing down across them. It was absolutely perfect for a little catnap. Well, not catnap exactly, but they laid in each others' arms and relaxed, deep purrs resounding through the tall grasses.

***

Jade was not having a good time. 

Dream bubbles can be hard to traverse at the best of times, and at the worst of times she was feeling just a little disconcerted. It had to do with the dog in her, she supposed, but there were all these scents and sounds just-- everywhere! All the time! They were distracting and amazing and altogether too much for a girl from a little island.

The ghosts tended toward the asshole side of the spectrum, too, which was just great. She was beating off purple douchebags with a stick and, well, a few possible interpretations of Karkat too, if she was being honest. He was just so loud! Her sensitive doggy ears couldn't take it. 

Karkat was an alright guy. He could even be reasonable sometimes, but between the troll flirting and the loud obnoxious copies of so many of them, it was just not in Jade's best interest to hang around them. 

And yet there they always were, coming in droves from briny depths or purple trees or sandy beaches. It seemed like trolls came from everywhere and she barely ever saw any of her fellow humans. Jade didn't mind, per se, but it was still _so weird._ Just when she thought she was getting good at interacting with them and with people in general, they threw a curveball at her.

Four types of romances! Not being able to kiss your ectobiological brother! God, people had so many rules that she just didn't know about. John had made the most weirded out face when she had tried to kiss him on the Prospitian ship. Sigh.

Jade thought she'd made a lot of progress learning boundaries and all that jazz, but she'd tried to hold John's hand just a few hours ago, before she fell asleep, and he'd gotten all weird again. Nevermind how angry other people could get when she "insulted" the so-called deep intricacies of the quadrants.

Whatever. People were silly. Jade had become accustomed to that over the course of the game, and she'd grown out of her sleepy old ways a little bit herself. 

The grass rustled behind her. Jade's ears perked, twitched, and she whirled around, baring her fangs. "Who's there?" She had a little more bark to her voice then before, given the obvious fusing with her pet dog thing. Her nostrils flared, taking in the scents around her, and there was-- lush grass, something musky, the scent of... cats? Okay, there was definitely a Leijon around, if Jade's nose was right, and it usually was. 

"Hey, come out!" Jade ordered, feeling her ears bristle. Okay, so maybe the Bec part of her wanted to chase around some cats from time to time. They were just so impudent, strutting around they owned the place, noses and tails in the air like that! Oh, wait, no, that was just Bec speaking, and Jade tried to relax the fur of her ears and the set of her teeth. She stepped forward some, wading through the tall grass. It was fundamentally impossible to see through, given its height, but Jade tried anyway.

She walked, squinting about warily, the musky scent growing stronger and stronger until- squish.

Jade looked down slowly at the puddle of olive green. It was vaguely sticky and she could feel it seeping into her shoes, warm and viscous. The stuff made a disgusting slurping noise as Jade stepped back from it, her mouth set in an incredibly confused line. It wasn't nearly as bad as a large pile of bear shit, but it was still kind of puzzling.

The grass rustled again, and Jade nearly forgot about whatever manner of weirdness she just stepped in. Nearly being the keyword there, because a cat girl flew out of the bushes and hit her with a mighty thump, sending her sprawling into the mysterious not-quite-liquid. God, it was all over, and it smelled so strong down here. It almost reminded her of something, but she was too busy yelling wordlessly and thrashing against the hundred and twenty pounds of mini might that had snagged her to be concerned about it.

"Hi Jade!" Nepeta grinned, snagging Jade's wrists and slamming them to the ground. There was a huntress' gleam in her blank eyes, somehow distinguishable by her predatory grin and overall stance. "Pinned mew!" 

"That's a silly pun and you know it," Jade bit out, struggling, but Nepeta's grip was insane.

"Mrr, you really think so? I thought fur sure it made sense, I use that one all the time," Nepeta mumbled, finally relenting and allowing Jade to sit up. Still, she maintained her close proximity, sitting on one of Jade's ankles idly, like she didn't even realize she was doing it. 

There was weird green stuff all over Jade's god tier outfit. "Bluh," she uttered, wiping at the stuff, wholly unaware of the olive-faced look Nepeta was giving her. "It's a good thing this stuff won't stain my real outfit!" Jade declared aloud, glaring down at it before turning her eyes back to Nepeta. She blinked. "Huh. You okay?"

"Oh?" Nepeta's eyelids fluttered. "Um, yeah, pawsitively purrfect," she said, shaking herself from some stupor. "Anyway, I wanted to to talk to mew!" At Jade's pointed look, she smiled sheepishly. "Ehe, see? All the time." 

Okay, fine, Jade could deal. It wasn't like she hated Nepeta! Nepeta was super adorable. She was just sort of loud sometimes, and that whole cat-like thing triggered the dog in her. "What is it?" she smiled, revealing her buckteeth fully to the world.

Nepeta bounced on Jade's ankle excitedly and stuck one of her hands up, throwing it into a series of confusing contortions Jade didn't recognize. "Mewlin'! She agreed to talk with us!"

And Meulin busted out of the the grass, practically squealing in excitement. Jade's ears flattened-- this was going to be maybe a little bit more difficult than she thought, then. "OMG I'm so excited, you have no idea, litterally the most excited fur sure! Well maybe not more excited than Nepurrta because it was her idea in the first place! I thought we'd have to hunt for way longer to find you but apparently not!"

"Hunt?" Jade asked, trying not to look to taken aback by this flurry of words.

"Yeah, hunt! The Hunt, even," Nepeta agreed, saying it in such a way that Jade could hear the capital 'h,' and damn how did people even do that? Jade wanted to know how to do that. "Beclaws, like, we've had our eyes on mew and we thought purrhaps mew might be interested in some fun!"

"Fun?" Jade parroted back, not quite getting it. "Um, if you want to play a game I guess that is a thing we can do!"

Meulin and Nepeta looked at each other and laughed while Jade looked between them, her face flushing and her ears flicking in irritation. "No, no," Meulin said, making those movements with her hands again. "It's a snifferent kind of fun!"

Up went one of Jade's eyebrows. "Um? What do you mean?"

Again, the two Leijons exchanged looks, this time a little less amused. "We should purrobably just tell her! Purrmission is important and stuff," Nepeta said.

"Tell me what?"

"You're right, but I didn't think she wouldn't get it! That's so cute!" Meulin's voice rose an octave and she clapped her hands together, as if Jade hadn't spoken at all. "It's like from one of my fanfics!"

"Hey, excuse me? Still here, you know," grumbled Jade, pulling at her leg to see if she could get it free. Whatever Nepeta was doing, it was surefire enough to keep Jade there. 

"Erm, right, we know!" Meulin grinned widely, her voice still overloud. "Here's the deal! Nepeta and I are hoping you can join us for a romp in the grass!"

While the lack of puns was refreshing and the niggling suspicion of what they were asking was now in Jade's mind, she was still making that same confused face, which is probably what prompted Nepeta to continue. "Right! We thought purrhaps you might wanna roll around with us."

"Wrestle with us, even!" Meulin giggled.

"Play the purrfect barkbeast to our meowbeasts!"

Still, Jade looked at them uncomprehendingly, a dull heat rising to her cheeks. Nepeta dug one fang into her lip, trying hard not to giggle, and finally burst out, "Do you wanna have sex with us?"

Oh.

Oh!

What the hell? 

"What the hell?" Jade repeated out loud, sputtering, that dull heat turning into a monumental roar. She jerked away from Nepeta's hold on her foot, and the oliveblood let her go freely this time. 

Truth be told, Jade had never had sex before. She barely even knew what it was beyond Dave's graphic metaphors, a few unfortunate google searches, and some nature documentaries. Well, no, she wasn't that innocent, but she didn't actually know how it was supposed to feel or anything, and she hadn't even been interested in finding out until she spent all that time cooped up with John for so long. He'd tried to explain a little bit of that whole mess to her, but ended up too red in the face to even bother.

And here were two dead cat girls, one probably too young and one infinite centuries dead, and they were offering that enigma that Jade didn't know if she even wanted to understand. 

Now the two of them, Nepeta and Meulin, looked a little concerned, honestly. "It's just a pawfur, we're not gonna make mew or anything," Nepeta meowed, looking out of sorts from how put-off Jade seemed. "Mew just seemed like the type of person who'd work with us and, well..."

"Barkbeasts make it fun fun fun, we thought it could be great to have someone to roleplay with us!" Meulin finished cheerfully. "And I was it would infuresting to play with humans a nip."

Their eyes, while dead, were hopeful. Jade was dreadfully curious, but John's bright red face hovered in her mind. "You're not supposed to kiss people related to you," he'd said, after a whole heck of a lot of stuttering and fanfare, and yet. Here the Leijons were, basically sisters, and apparently they had sex on a regular basis. Maybe the rules about sex between siblings were different, but Jade really didn't think so.

So. That left a few options. One, trolls were weird and had sex with their siblings all the time. Two, John was weird for not wanting to smooch her. Three, everyone was just goddamn weird.

Jade was placing bets on the last one.

When it came right down to it, Jade just wasn't sure. Her lips flattened together uncertainly, one ear twisting down, and the Leijons read her body language like she was an open book or some sort of easy to spook animal of prey. They approached her slowly, simultaneously, fluidly; they really were cats in every sense of the word barring its actual meaning. Meulin's stance was lower, her steps slightly louder, but all the same.

It made Jade want to bark and lower her tail even though she didn't have one. She wanted to run or lash out and go for the throat because damn those impudent kittens- and yet, frozen by uncertainty, Jade didn't move. 

They sidled up to either side of her. Nepeta was short, small, but well-muscled. Meulin was almost the opposite, though Jade got the feeling she was still rather vertically challenged for a troll. Her fingers were long and fine and reached out ever so slowly, giving Jade ample time to flee, before brushing against her shoulder. Meulin ran her hands though Jade's thick, dark hair, sweeping it back to expose her neck.

At the same time, Nepeta reached out and took Jade's hand, thumbing small circles across it. She moved more quickly than her counterpart, but still carefully, still calculated. The Leijons were smart, whatever anyone said about them. They were hunters at heart.

"Mew don't have to do anything mew don't want to!" Nepeta said, smiling encouragingly.

"Yes!" Meulin blinked slowly. "Oh my God, I just realized you might already have all your quadrants filled! Is there somepawdy else? Oh no, I don't want to sink any ships!" The elder Leijon seemed truly frightened by this possibility, fretting and worrying away at her lips with her fangs. Almost bitterly, surprising herself, Jade thought of John and his dumb red face and flustered even further.

"No!" she shook her head, denying any ships she may or may not have been a part of vehemently. "I'm not," Jade said, slightly more subdued and just a tad embarrassed. "But this is sort of sudden, isn't it? I'm pretty sure you're supposed to take me to dinner first or something like that!" She pulled randomly from her grab bag of Dave metaphors, hoping it would come up with something useful. Judging by Nepeta and Meulin's blank stares, probably not.

Although they could just be blank stares because their eyes were literally white and dead, but. Jade shook her head. "Okay, nevermind, I just don't kno- oh!" she yelped as Meulin leaned forward, delicately pressing her nose into Jade's neck. She inhaled softly, laughter bubbling up from her throat, and Jade didn't even know how to begin to respond to that whole thing. Her canine instincts told her to back out and run because there was a thing with sharp teeth right near her neck, but Jade managed to relax that part of herself after a few seconds. It wasn't like Meulin was biting, after all. She was just breathing.

"Um," Jade said, eloquently.

Nepeta nuzzled gingerly into her shoulder. Her skin was a little rougher. "We really want mew to think about it, okay?" Her hands her creeping up Jade's arm, gentle as they could be, which of course meant there was just a hint of sharp claw. 

"Uh."

"You're just the cutest little thing!" Meulin said, pressing more firmly into Jade's neck. "We only wanna play!" She was still much too loud, but her pout was soft against Jade's skin. The human girl shuddered, caught between two Leijons and images of John and his sometimes scruffy chin and he would disapprove so very, very much.

But it wasn't like he had the right to! Righteous indignation flared up in Jade for that moment, and her face set. John didn't even need to be upset; they were siblings, like he kept stressing, and so if he was jealous he needed to get his priorities straight. Nepeta and Meulin noticed the change in Jade's demeanor and grinned at each other from across a dark-skinned collarbone.

Nepeta purred. "Please say yes?" One of her legs wrapped idly around Jade's, slender and rubbing up against her striped tights and holy shit she was flexible, how was her foot so close to the inside of Jade's thigh? 

"Y-yes," Jade stammered out, trying to recover from the shock of Nepeta's foot stroking the full length of her leg. Was that even possible? That didn't seem like a possible thing.

The Leijons cheered as one, Nepeta's voice higher pitched but Meulin's reaching higher octaves more quickly. Jade's ears pressed flat, horrified by their abject abuse. The two of them together were more than enough to bring Jade down to the ground in their excitement.

"We're gonna make mew feel so good," Nepeta hummed, licking a raspy stripe up Jade's shirt. She tasted her own release and grinned deviously.

This was going to be fun.

***

It was probably the moaning that drew John in. He tried not to make it a habit, the whole sneaking up on ghosts fucking thing, but there was always a chance that it was one of the ones that he'd sort of been developing a little crush on. Well, not exactly a crush-- okay, it was totally a crush, and he didn't know how to deal with it because they were dead and he wasn't and besides that he didn't even begin to know how to approach someone romantically.

Movies only taught someone so much, after all, and the three-hundreth watch of Con Air was no more helpful than the ninetieth. Yeah, he could pretty much quote the entire movie by memory, completely with the details of each shot.

Point being, Con Air was shit help for teaching someone how to romance another person, so John had become half a dream creep. He really, really tried to avoid it, but sometimes he heard moans and the bubble morphed around him into a bedroom and he hid behind a door. Sometimes that door was cracked open, and sometimes it had a keyhole.

No one could really blame him if he peeked through, red-faced and wondering who was there.

Who was John kidding? He really could be sort of gross, and he didn't ever do it on purpose. He just got stuck sometimes, stuck in situations where there were people doing the do and he didn't want them to know he was there because it would be embarrassing for everybody.

This was sort of one of those times, given that his sister- holy shit, Jade -was moaning openly, her ears quivering this way and that. Her brilliant green eyes were glued shut, her hair plastered to her forehead with a thin sheen of sweat. She laid out in the clearing of the grass, her knees locked together and both Leijons working away at her while she shivered. 

Meulin's hands stroked up Jade's legs, ever gentle, laughter burbling from deep in her chest, and occasionally she tangled her fingers in that thatch of hair between Jade's thighs. It was thick hair, curly, so like John's own. Meulin seemed fascinated with it, probably because she had none of her own. She tugged on it gently and ran her talons along the edge of each hair, more than content to take her time.

Just as leisurely and infinitely curious, Nepeta tugged and kneaded at Jade's chest- it had gotten larger in their years on the ship, John was mildly horrified to note. Why was he still watching this? It was upsetting, watching two girls he'd found himself interested in slowly and methodically working over his sister. It was _upsetting_ the way Jade's mouth opened in a silent cry, strings of spit connecting her fangs and her tongue all lolling about.

Yes, upsetting was completely the right word, especially when Meulin's hand dipped even lower, between Jade's thighs.

John had no idea why he was getting hard.

Absolutely no idea, even as Nepeta and Meulin looked up and grinned at each other, going in for a quick sloppy kiss. Jade whined and wriggled, her eyes slitting open in a fantastic show of green, her toes curling, and John tried hard not to stumble backwards. He felt like she was looking right at him, space eyes and all, except no. Jade's eyes were flickering between the Leijons now, watching them nip at each others' mouths.

Skillfully, Meulin's fingers slipped into that nook between Jade's legs, and Jade didn't even seem to see it coming, so focused as she was on their mouths. John found himself suitably distracted by them as well, to be honest. Ever since he'd first run into them, Meulin and Nepeta had caught his eye. They were adorable, both of them, and so easy-going it was hard not to like them.

It was even harder not to get invested in how sexually open they were, even if their current target was his sister, of all people. He'd sort of thought, well. They had been doing a lot of purring and rubbing up against him every single time they met. That was cat affection, wasn't it? And they were both so cute, so he thought-- agh, nevermind! That wasn't the point. Romance wasn't the point when there was so much going on. Right? Right.

Resolved, John tried to back out of this situation, wary of the way his knees felt like jelly and his dick was starting to throb a little. Actually, yeah, it was definitely twitching, because Meulin had just coaxed Jade to open her legs and John was getting a front row seat to everything he'd convinced himself he never wanted to see.

It was time to go, John told himself. Definitely time to go. He made to do just that, and even made it a few feet before Jade made a startled yipping noise.

Concern won him over. She may have been neck deep in sex, but she was still John's friend, sister, and basically the best company he had on the ship. Well, if you didn't count Davesprite, which was something John so rarely did. He wasn't the head palhoncho for nothing.

But of course Meulin and Nepeta weren't hurting Jade. "Wow, wow," Jade was panting, "What is that?"

Nepeta grinned mischievously while Meulin worked her magic. "A vipurrator!"

John froze. Okay, so. He really didn't need to turn around to see this whole mess going down, but his body seemed to be turning all on its own, his vibrant blue eyes widening as if to catch every little detail. Oh God, why? He was sure doing a fucked up thing right now.

The regret could come later, because the scene that unfolded in front of him was beautiful. There was Jade, all played out, the tension gone from her legs, transferred to her arching back. Her legs spread apart, hips bucking up and up to get more contact from that buzzing little emerald bullet Meulin was working around her lower lips. She was so wet and her hands were clawing at the ground and- holy shit, John only had eyes for her in that second.

Inevitably, though, his gaze wandered toward Nepeta, who was sitting back now, one hand idly tweaking Jade's nipple and the other wrapped around her bulge. Shit, it was so tiny, smaller than John's even, but he guessed that made sense because she was younger. Meulin's bulge was out too, swirling against the open air because both of her hands were occupied. One held the vibrator flush against Jade's clit, working it in little circles, and the other was wrapped up in Jade's own hand, slowly pulling to a more favorable position.

That is to say, all tangled up with Meulin's bulge, rubbing against her spines. 

John swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing.

Hurt bubbled up in him along with the arousal and it was all so confusing he didn't know what the make of it. He should have been disgusted. Two sisters basically making out and fucking his sister. Any good brother would have been horrified and either fled or rescued her by now, but it wasn't exactly like John and Jade's situation was normal. Ugh, John just wanted to pull his hair out. The only thing he was getting from standing here was the most awkward boner. He could talk to Jade later, when she wasn't busy.

Yes, okay, John turned resolutely and meant to leave. He meant to, but with all the distractions and spinning around, he'd gotten himself a little tangled up in his god tier hood. The first step he tried to take ended up with him tripping and falling backwards. He heard Jade swear in surprise behind him, heard Nepeta's startled hiss and the way Meulin yowls in shock.

"John? What the fuck?" Jade said in a groggy voice, a rasp on the edge like talking is exhausting to her. Her vocal chords jumped out half a moan before she stifled it because there was still a vibrator pressed up against her unmentionables.

John stuttered uselessly, cursing his pants for being so soft and revealing. "Uh, I, uh, sorry," he tried, scrambling up, just barely managing to pull his shirt down in a meager attempt to hide his arousal. At the same time he was going beet red, covering his eyes with one hand and attempting to run away. That was a stupid idea, given that he couldn't see where he was going and ended up tripping again, this time landing flat on his face.

"Are mew okay, Egpurrt?" Nepeta asked, blinking owlishly at him.

"Yes I am fine that is definitely a thing I am I will talk to you later goodbye," John yelped all at once, yanking himself up and fleeing the scene.

Or he would have, in Nepeta had not immediately given chase and landed fully on his back. "Holy shit!" he shrieked, faceplanting again. None of this was good for him, he was sure, but his dick was starting to hurt from its repeated bashing into the ground and-- well, there was a small naked cat girl pinning him down, her tiny hot bulge squirming up against his skin.

Wow, this was not a thing he had been expecting when he went to sleep. Nepeta leaned down and inhaled deeply at the base of John's neck. "Mew don't smell fine! You smell sweaty and nervous," she squinted at the back of his head, wriggling her tush like it might help needle answers out of him.

"Nope, I am fine," John insisted around a mouthful of grass. "Or I would be if there weren't a naked girl getting my pajamas all dirty!"

Nepeta raised her eyebrows and huffed. She nipped the base of John's skull and felt the fullbody shudder run through him, tickling her bulge. "Liar liar pants on fire," she meowed. "You're mad, I can tell."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Well if I am it's only because you were rubbing all over me last time we talked and now you're having sex with my sister!" John belted out, making everyone else in the vicinity freeze up. Jade whimpered softly, the lack of movement really not good for the stimulation she was seeking. Her body canted up, out of her control, but her ears were straining to hear what John was saying.

Meulin met Nepeta's eyes, their faces vaguely duplicitous. They had the same idea, like they so often did, and Meulin grinned widely. "If you wanted to play all you had to do was ask! We're not persnickitty! It just so catpuns that we'd love you to join us. What do you think, Jade?" She turned the vibrations up and John could hear them, could hear Jade whimpering.

"Y-yes, sure, okay," she howled out, squirming all around.

"But we're related!" John yelped out, almost desperate, knowing he shouldn't find this nearly as hot as he did. Still, his hips were spasming, desperately rutting for friction against the ground. It continued to be almost painful and he really wished Nepeta would let him up so he could run out of embarrassment already.

Perplexed, Nepeta said, "What's that got to do with anything?"

Right, trolls were nothing but a giant incestuous slurry anyway. John opened his mouth, but Meulin beat him to the punch. "Wow, Nepurrta! Don't be insensitive! Humans have a lot of problems and complicatpuns with that sort of thing," she said, and John breathed a sigh of relief. "But! Wouldn't that make the best story? A furbitten romance, all full of intrigue and angst and fluff and- ohhh, that would make a great fic!" She was getting excited now, bouncing on her heels, one hand still nonchalantly moving between Jade's legs. "Two people still holding onto their old civilization's silly rules, despurrately flushed for one another but unable to show it!" Meulin squealed with delight, kicking out her legs. 

This, of course, jostled Jade, who yelped out of frustration. She'd never felt this way before and John, stupid John who wouldn't even let her give him kisses, was ruining it! "John, either get over here or leave us alone!" she barked, frustrated. "You're being a baby!"

"I'd do one of those things if, you know, there wasn't someone sitting on my back!" argued John, pouting, the leafy taste of grass muffling him. 

"Oh," Nepeta giggled, and leapt nimbly off of him. She giggled a little more when she realized she'd left an obnoxious green stain on his back, but she couldn't help that. The thrill of the hunt always got to her. John stood, brushed himself off without realizing his new coloration, and looked back at them. His was filled with blood and, honestly, so was his cock, but. He just. Couldn't. He couldn't do what the three of them wanted him to do. Jade was gorgeous and she looked so much like him it was insanity, and Meulin and Nepeta were basically right out of a wet dream.

Did this count as a wet dream? John guessed he'd see when he woke up, but no. This was stupid. "I," he said, his voice little more than a croak. "I should go."

He didn't go. He just stood there while Nepeta tilted her head further and further.

John's shoulders grew tense. "Okay, nevermind, I have something to say. It might sound silly but, well, whatever!" He faced them boldly even though his heart was rabbiting in his chest, even though he had the biggest boner for all of them right now. "I thought you liked me! I thought, well, you all had crushes on me and now you're," he pulled at his collar. "You're doing this! What's going on?" He was so confused, honestly. 

Meulin hummed. "Huh? We don't not like you!"

"We weren't hunting mew, but that doesn't mean we don't like mew," Nepeta agreed, grinning savagely, her paws tickling at the hems of John's pants. Man, how'd she even sneak up to him to be able to do that? The friction against his dick was delicious and he inhaled sharply, helplessly.

"I didn't think," Jade huffed, "that you'd care! You don't have any right to be- ah! -jealous when you keep pushing me away."

"But- holy shit, what're you doing?" John leapt ten feet in the air as Nepeta pawed gently, curiously, at the tent that still hadn't wilted in his pants.

She had the respect to look a little sheepish. "Is that not okay?"

"Uh." John had no idea what to say, frankly, but his libido had a decent thought. "I mean, yes? It's okay?" 

"Yay!" Nepeta cheered.

He was starting to get a little light-headed, and this time he feel backwards onto his rump of his own accord with a light nudge from Nepeta. She yanked at his pants, pulling them down to reveal his ghostly boxers. God, this was hideously embarrassing, especially with the way Nepeta poked and prodded and groped like she had no idea what was in there. When someone had a literal trouser snake, John supposed immobile penises were sort of weird in comparison.

No, though, there was something else he was supposed to be thinking about. "But, uh, Jade," he stammered, and oh hell it was going to be hard to talk while Nepeta did that petting thing. "I thought, I didn't," okay, yeah. He couldn't talk at all. In fact, all he could do was making embarrassingly high-pitched moaning noises while Nepeta pulled down his boxers.

He guessed maybe he would have to have a heart-to-heart with Jade later, when alien cat girls weren't trying to get them off.

Not that that was going to be difficult, because Nepeta had the fantastic idea of climbing into John's lap, straddling his hips, and letting her bulge go to town on his. Well, he didn't have a bulge, but close enough and it was getting kind of hard for John to have any sort of reasonable thought at all. There was a string of incomprehensible gibberish falling from his lips and, barely, he heard Jade making similar sounds.

John opened his eyes just a little bit, just to check and make sure Jade was okay, but what he made heat shoot right through him to his balls. Itching twitches ran up his legs but he dare not move a muscle.

The vibrator was doing good work for Jade, slipping in and out of her with absolute ease just from how wet she was- dripping down her legs, a veritable puddle. Still, Meulin occasionally dragged it up to twist around Jade's clit, laughing as the other girl made those keening noises. Wrapped twice around Jade's palm was Meulin's bulge, leaking olive liquid, and John wasn't sure how much more of this he could take.

In fact, he was absolutely certain he couldn't take any more of this. Jade just sounded so much like him and there was wet hot heat everywhere, searing into his skin, and Nepeta nibbling on his collarbone while he tore into the grass behind him. Everything was burning and deadly and intense, but it was the sound of Jade's howls that really sent him over the edge.

Literally, perhaps, because John woke up with his hand fisting his cock furiously, a white mess splattered into his god tier pants. 

Yep, that had definitely been a wet dream.

John was going to have a hell of a time getting those stains out. He found a towel nearby to use for easy clean up and changed pants. The god tier pajamas found themselves jammed into the closest washing machine.

So.

Now John was wandering around shirtless, and of course he bumped into Jade on her way to the laundry room. She was walking a little funny, and he was pretty sure there was a pair of soiled panties in one of her hands. "Um," he said to her as they passed one another.

"Not right now."

She breezed by him, which should have been his territory because he was Breath, but nope. Jade had that shit as down as she could, chucking her laundry in with his. Was it weird that that gave John sort of a warm fuzzy feeling of domesticity? ...Yeah, probably.

The washing machine made heavy clunking noises as John settled down onto the couch and put his head in his hands. 

It was going to be a long couple of days.


End file.
